Hi First, The Bonus Pics
Bath or shower?
Just hang on.
All tee'd up!
Every picture tells a story.
Loosing the shirt.
It's the look!
Out of the blue.
The early morning selie.
On his mettle.
Make your bed, you naught boy!
He's nicely charged.
Let's throw a bit of light on the subject.
Starry in heaven.
Nipple hide n seek.
Not the selfie to show your Mum!
Anybody out there?
The rewards of concentration.
What goes up must come down.
That's not what I expected.
Who just arrived in Selfie Heaven?
Two for the price of one. Lovely!
Watching you watching me!
There we go again.
An apple a day....
The Apple of someone's eye.
Leaning left in selfie heaven!
Yes, it's the era of the selfie. Now if you happen to be older than God, you might just believe that this is some new word of abuse for estate agents or bankers, driven selfishly by thoughts only of their commissions, never of the welfare of their clients. WRONG!
We refer, of course to those photographs posted on the social networks usually taken with a smartphone by the star of the picture, an arm often extended in front of them, frequently posed in front of a mirror with the phone on display. It's a ubiquitous feature of today's visual, cyber world, where the internet dating site yields speed catalogue shopping, the thrill of expectation and the opportunity to opt in or out.
Some might call it paradise. But if you're a selfie poster, you might pause to absorb a few guidelines, offered with warmth, a sense of humour and just a little insight. Helpfully demonstrated with hand-picked examples, here come our 20 easy steps to Selfie Heaven.
1. Originality does no harm. Whether teaming Lick, a lollipop and an ice bath is overkill, you decide.
2. Okay, it does no harm to check that everything is still intact.
3. Why not keep it colourful?
4. It does no harm to show that you have an interest beyond the all-pervasive sexual. Music works.
5. Pose by all means but keep it naturalish, right?
6. Vary the posture. When three quarters or more of all selfies are full-frontals, go wild, go side-on.
7. The thumb in the waistband may be endearing. But it's becoming a cliché.
8. Smouldering looks can complement the pose if you can pull them off. The looks that is.
9. And if it's a good six pack, make the most of the camera angle.
10. Earn immediate accolades with your fondness for the Stars and Stripes.
11. A look that's too knowing can also counteract the charm offensive.
12. And you can overdo the leftover towels.
13. The close up lean into frame makes for a less usual format.
14. Yes, those props can add a new dimension. Just keep the keys close at hand.
15. Yes, show off your best feature. But are you sure it's your tongue?
16. That touch of mystery can go a long way to inspire interest. But don't be too kind to Nike.
17. Keep it simple. Philosophical messaging is likely to defeat the overall objective.
18. Work the angles, just like he does. But maybe simplify the background a bit!
19. This is getting close to good. Not too much distraction, a touch of vulnerability and big eyes. Charming.
20. Finally, if you haven't got quite what he had, stay brave. Having decided to give a selfie a try, it's no time to be retreating back into the closet.
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